The Acts of Marriage: Husband and Father (Part 2)
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…Jesus is the pattern for manhood. This fact can be overwhelming. After all, Jesus is perfect. However, those who are imperfect, (me and you) must have the goal to line up with the pattern. As men we will never do anything perfectly. But we must be found doing the very things that Jesus did for the church.
In the first chapter of Ephesians, Paul records that the name of Christ is above every name and all things are under his feet. God made him head over all things to the church. This speaks of Jesus’ leadership role. As Paul completes this thought in chapter five verses 31 and 32, husbands are the same type of leader in their marriage. But it is servant-leadership. Jesus takes the lead by suffering and dying for his bride. Jesus planned his servant-leadership role and he took the initiative to bring it to pass.
Servant-leadership prohibits brutality, and Jesus’ intentional actions prohibits passive couch surfing. The pattern is perfect even when we are not. So, it is a call of God to every husband to gladly take on the responsibility of Christ-like, servant-leadership in the home, making provisions for, and offering protection to, his bride.
According to our focal verses, if we love our wives correctly she feels nourished and cherished. (Ephesians 5:28-29) In this session we will look at what it means to be a husband and father that nourishes and cherishes his family.
Protection and Provision (vs 25-27)
Taking the initiative
Not doing all the work
Nourish and Cherish (vs 28-30)
Taking initiative to see that needs are met
Willing to sacrifice anything for the good of wife and children
The Example of Job
Job’s heart for God and family (Job 1:5)
God’s heart for Job (Job 1:8)
A primary purpose (Job 19:25)
Job’s confession (Job 42:1-6)
What women long for is spiritual and moral initiative from a man, not spiritual and moral domination.
Husband leadership is design for God’s Glory and our good.
Click on the link below to view/print the homework sheet for week four of the Biblical Marriage study.
The Acts of Marriage: Husband and Father (Part 1)
We established that marriage is the doing of God. Marriage is established at the very beginning. Before the sixth day of creation ends we see our first wedding. We are created to be image bearers. We bear the image of our Creator. As God made man in His own image, so He made earthly marriage in the image of His own eternal marriage with His people. Therefore, as long as Christ tarries, marriage will stand for one thing only, Christ loving his church. In other words, marriage is the image bearer of the Gospel.
As such, our marriage is a covenant relationship that mirrors the New Covenant in the Blood of Christ. Marriage is not a function of self gratification; it is a vessel of sacrificial love rewarding all who participate.
In this session we look at the role of husband and father. In Paul’s definition of the one flesh relationship recorded in Ephesians 5:21-33, husbands are compared to Christ, wives are compared to the church. Husbands are compared to the head; wives are compared to the body. Husbands are commanded to love as Christ loved. The roles Paul describes are unique. In this session we begin to explore their uniqueness.
Roles begin in Mutual Submission (vs 21)
Humble service to the other
Build each other up
Does NOT cancel out Headship
Mutual Submission is defined in Unique Roles (vs 22-33)
Husbands compared to Christ
Wives compared to the church
Husbands compared to the Head
Wives compared to the Body
Roles are not arbitrary or reversible
MEN – Bring Your Headship into Conformity
Husband Headship – one of the most broken parts of our culture
Sin corrupted- Brutal / Passive
Christ-like Servant Leader who:
Definition of Headship: Headship is the divine calling of a husband to take primary responsibility for Christ-like, servant leadership, protection, and provision in the home.
Getting First Things Right; Second Things ALWAYS Get Better
What is at stake here is the Gospel
Foundation of Marriage; Naked and Not Ashamed
Genesis 2:24-25 / Genesis 3:1-7
In the first session we established that Marriage is the doing of God. Marriage is a key part of the creation story. From the very beginning, God created them male and female and brought them together in a one flesh relationship. The creation story in the first chapter of Genesis ends with a wedding!
We also established that the ultimate thing regarding marriage is that it is the display of Christ and the church. The Apostle Paul in Ephesians 5:31-32 reveals that leaving parents and holding fast to a wife, forming a one flesh union, is meant from the beginning to display the New Covenant…Christ’s leaving his Father in heaven and taking the church as his bride, at the cost of his life, and holding fast to her in one-spirit union forever.
In other words, our weddings take place on, and remain on display from, the stage of life where as husband and wife we preach the Gospel (with our marriage union) to everyone who looks our way…especially our children. As such, we see that the primary command in Genesis 1:28, “Be fruitful and multiply”, and Jesus’ command in Matthew 28:20, “Go and make disciples”, are at their core the same command.
This week we will explore the statement at the end of the creation account which says “they were naked and not ashamed” (Genesis 2:25). It’s hard to have an understanding of such a statement in our culture. However, in this statement rests the knowledge that within our marriages there lies security, safety, and power for the purpose for which we are called to be husband and wife.
What is the main point of Verse 25?
Naked and Not Ashamed
Verse 24 creates what verse 25 needs to be true.
‘Naked and not ashamed’ can only happen inside a one-flesh relationship
Creates the context for a shame-free marriage…
Is God’s design for all love relationships…
Even though I am imperfect;
I have no fear of being shamed.
Covenant Love Covers Sin:
1 Peter 4:8; 1 Corinthians 13:6
When the Covenant Collapses
Declaration of Independence (Genesis 3:5-7)
All-trusting security of marriage disappears forever
Result of the Broken Covenant
Vulnerability to Shame:
Learning to relate in selfishness
Feeling guilty and unworthy
Significance of Clothing
Negative: We are no longer what we should be
Positive: God will one day make us what we should be through the blood
The ‘Fall’ did not change God’s purpose in marriage
Love can only grow in the soil of GRACE in Marriage
Your marriage was created by God to be a safe and sacred place to be naked and not ashamed
Wednesday, October 8th, (6:00PM Arizona Time) we begin a ten week study entitled: Biblical Marriage: Can my marriage thrive in a 21st century business world? Our first session will focus on the core foundation and purpose of God’s design.
Foundation of Marriage; God’s Design
Genesis 2:18-25 / Ephesians 5:31-32
Genesis 2:18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 19 Now out of the ground the Lord God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said,
“This at last is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman,
because she was taken out of Man.”
24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.
Marriage is God’s Doing –
Designed by God – Genesis 1:27-28 / 2:24
God made and gave the first bride – Genesis 2:22
God owns marriage
God and marriage can never be viewed as separate
Marriage was established during creation and doesn’t change
Ephesians 5:31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
Marriage reveals God and the Gospel –
Marriage is a covenant – 5:31
Marriage is a pattern – 5:32
Marriage is viewed as unbreakable –
I will never leave you…
Marriage is not a picture of self-gratification; it is a picture of self-sacrifice.
Marriage is designed by God to display the Gospel to the world.